one year

One whole year. That's how long it's been since we found out you'd be joining us. But you had started growing weeks before - seven weeks to be exact. I took the test while your dad was at work, just knowing it would be another negative I could toss in the trash. I couldn't be pregnant. Not now. Not after we'd put our plans to start a family on hold while we prepared to move abroad. Not after nearly a year of trying - complete with charts and vitamins and diligently working to be in the best physical shape possible. Not after all those months that ended in disappointment. We'd put our house on the market and found an apartment in Germany. We were ready to leave the U.S. - no strings attached - for two years.

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We'd just returned from Europe a few days before. I couldn't fathom the thought (or smell) of the Neuhaus chocolates we'd brought back from Belgium. I was exhausted and nauseous and an emotional basket case. Your dad joked that I was probably pregnant, but I was convinced it was just jet lag. But there I stood, on the cold tile floor in our bathroom on a Monday afternoon, staring down at a stick that revealed a dark blue vertical line. There was no doubt. My heart raced, and I looked in the mirror at someone I didn't recognize - in an instant, I had become a mother. No one can prepare you for that feeling. I went downstairs and sat on the couch for over an hour, but I couldn't even come up with some creative way to share the news. Your dad came in the door, and I just blurted it out. We were shocked, nervous, and so very excited.

One year ago, while you were growing inside of me (and wreaking havoc on my appetite), I could never have imagined what it would be like to have you here. You were worth it all: The waiting and wanting. The weeks of surviving mostly on ginger ale and clementines. The discomforts of pregnancy and the pain and chaos of bringing you into this world. The (still ongoing) sleepless nights and long days fueled by coffee. Every bit of it. Times a million.

One whole year. That's how long it's been since I discovered you existed, but I feel like I've loved you forever. It's hard to remember what life was like before your gummy smile and big blue eyes. You are one great big bundle of sunshine.

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Sweet boy - you are more than I ever knew I wanted, and I am eternally grateful and beyond humbled to be your mama. 

xoxoxoxo... 

life lately: an update from germany

Whew! It's been over two months since I last posted, and the time just slipped away. Since January, we've returned to Germany (following a fiasco in which I discovered my passport was nowhere to be found less than 24 hours before our scheduled departure), survived and (I think) made it to the other side of the four month sleep regression, and soaked up lots of fun times in our foreign home with our ever growing boy. He's now actively playing with his toys, loves to sit and stand up (assisted, of course), is *so close* to rolling from back to belly, cackles when mommy tickles him or gets his toes, is happiest in the bath, is a trooper on long walks about town in his stroller or ErgoBaby carrier, and smiles so big every day when daddy gets home from work :) Basically, he's the best.

Here are a few iPhone photos of the past couple of months:

Miles's 1st plane ride - he handled international travel like a trooper!

Miles's 1st plane ride - he handled international travel like a trooper!

Love these sweet baby snuggles so much.

Love these sweet baby snuggles so much.

So many beautiful, sunny days in Aachen! Unfortunately, we're back to cold and rainy for the time being.

So many beautiful, sunny days in Aachen! Unfortunately, we're back to cold and rainy for the time being.

Is that not the cutest little tiger you've ever seen?!

Is that not the cutest little tiger you've ever seen?!

The Easter bunny brought Miles a Sophie la Girafe teething toy and his first German books, and Mommy and Daddy hosted a yummy brunch for friends!

The Easter bunny brought Miles a Sophie la Girafe teething toy and his first German books, and Mommy and Daddy hosted a yummy brunch for friends!

This past weekend, we took a day trip to Monschau where we visited their Historic Mustard Mill, picked up some delicious coffee from a local rosterie, and wandered about this adorable little town.

This past weekend, we took a day trip to Monschau where we visited their Historic Mustard Mill, picked up some delicious coffee from a local rosterie, and wandered about this adorable little town.

This face cracks me up... this kid definitely has personality :)

This face cracks me up... this kid definitely has personality :)

This is what we were choosing to do instead of sleep last night. Baby squeals :)

To see more photos of our Glessner family adventures, follow me on Instagram.